The Great University Adventure: Open Day

Hey, you remember how in August I told you I was going to go to the open day for my local university? And that I was thinking of doing a Creative Writing MA? No? Okay, well go and read this post first, then. So fastforward to last Saturday. It’s the day of our friend’s funeral. […]

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Achievement Hunter

When I am nestled at my deskwith another game on the screendo not think of me as lazy. Today I caught my hundredth pet and got the achievement for it, another star next to my name. Do you think these things meaningless just because they’re in pixels? Just because they’re not real? They’re real to […]

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5 ways to motivate yourself on a bad depression day

Sometimes with depression, you wake up and it’s just bad. Just awful. There might not be a reason you can see for it. You just woke up and everything was terrible and, somehow, you’ve got to find a way to motivate yourself through the day. I have days like this every week. So here are […]

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Medication: being on it and coming off

Since my breakdown at 17, I have been almost constantly on some form of anti-depressant and/or anti-anxiety medication. The only times I wasn’t taking a medication were because I had, without medical recommendation, decided that I just wasn’t taking it anymore. Or for much shorter times, because I had screwed up or couldn’t afford the […]

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For Marius

The strangest thing about losing youIs that we haven’t just lost you.Somewhere a brother is grieving his twin,a storyteller is stepping through a gate,and shield bearers are kneeling in troubled memory. But here is what I like to imagine: In another world that is both ours and not, a man cast in moonlight takes up […]

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4 reasons Nanowrimo sucks as a professional writer

I know. It makes absolutely no logical sense. I’m a professional writer -Nanowrimo is just me doing more of that same job. Surely it’s not any different? Well amongst the other reason that Nanowrimo has been tough – even impossible – this year, I’ve also struggled with adding it to my workload generally. So here, […]

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Self-Employment: When is work not work?

Let’s say you go to a ‘normal’ 9-5 job. It’s in an office, you have a desk or a cubicle, at lunchtime you get a break where you probably eat a crappy sandwich or something. Basically everything you do in that office is work. Not 100% everything, of course. Going to the toilet is not […]

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Letter to my 20-year-old self

Cateline's divination deck - stories told with stories within a story.

Dear Rebecca – or, I suppose, dear me, because this is weird enough without starting off all formal when I’m talking to my own damn self. Okay. Here’s the thing. It feels right now like everything’s shit; that’s because right now everything’s shit. You’ve had six years of awful after eight years of awful and, […]

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Nanowrimo is…well, shit

It’s the 12th November, and I have written 8,053 words for Nanowrimo. Par – which is the target for this day to hit 50,000 by the end of the month – is 20,000. I haven’t allowed myself to fully give up yet, but I think I might need to. I think I need to accept […]

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I made a cleaning calendar…and now I’m less stressed?

A tidy house is a tidy mind. It’s trite, but in my experience it’s very true. Horribly so, in fact, because the problem with depression is…well, it makes you less able to do things like cleaning. Then you end up stuck in this messy building. Which makes you more, or at least stay, very depressed. […]

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